the L A S T time I freaked O U T • `juno

[{ effy mosse]

{effy lianne mosse

let me be your stupid little fuck up }

effy frowned at the ceiling, trying to calm herself down. she hated her sister right now. she knew that caitlin loved her and didn't want her to get hurt, but for fuck's sake, couldn't she just butt out every once in a while? if effy wanted to ruin her life, then effy should be allowed, right?

not according to fucking caitlin.

effy didn't care that cait was upset, that she was disappointed. this was her life and she'd live it the way she wanted to, and if that involved fucking it up, then so be it. effy didn't actually mind her life right now. she was getting over her stupid anorexia - even though she'd been accused of being bulimic seeing as she wasn't gaining any weight - she didn't want to be the most important person in the world any more, though she did still want to be important . . . the only thing that was wrong with her was her bdd.

what she hated the most about bdd is that people assume that it's an attention thing. that the person who has it hasn't had enough attention in their lives and now they're getting it by doing one of the most drastic things possible. effy had always had enough attention as a kid - though when she was living with her real father, it wasn't the type of attention she really wanted - so that claim was totally untrue, for effy, at least.

looking over at her clock, effy punched her pillow violently when she saw that it was only half past ten. the only annoying thing about being the youngest person at franklin high - effy was only fourteen, and she wouldn't be fifteen for at least a couple of months - was that she had a curfew. she had to be in her room by half ten, and asleep by eleven.

effy had no intention of following rules tonight. her fight with caitlin had left her bored, and ready to rebel. she should still have a bottle or two of vodka under her bed. she'd had to ask one of the older patients to get it for her, seeing as she looked so damn young. rolling off her bed and cursing when she landed on her shoe, effy pushed various items of clothing out of the way - and finding the other half to the shoe she'd just landed on - and grinned when she spotted her vodka. crawling out from underneath her bed, effy ran into her bathroom and pulled out two mini bottles of shampoo, emptying the contents into the bigger bottle she stored under her sink.

after having washed the bottles out thoroughly, effy poured the vodka into them, occasionally drinking it, which meant that she had to go through the whole process again. by the time she was finished with one bottle, she was feeling very light-headed. effy was a light-weight, through and through.

finishing the bottle of vodka, effy threw it into the bin and went back to crawl under her bed again, falling on the shoe yet again. pulling a second bottle of vodka out, effy managed to stumble her way back into her bathroom and fill up the second bottle, knowing that if she took two and managed to find juno, they'd have a whole load of fun.

grinning drunkenly to herself, effy drank more than half of the second bottle before she deemed herself ready to go out. slipping her feet into her bright blue shoes, effy concealed the bottles in her jacket pocket - well, technically it was caitlin's, but cait didn't know that effy had stolen it. she could feel a box of cigarettes in her pocket, and effy grimly filed that away in her mind. she'd have to tell someone that cait had started smoking. the thought that effy was definitely doing underage drinking didn't occur to her.

walking right past the canteen, effy pulled a face as the smell of food hit her. it was like walking into a brick wall. backing away, effy smashed into a teacher, who was looking at effy with a suspicious expression on her face.

"jennifer, have you been drinking?" the teacher asked, scrutinising effy's face. effy didn't realise until it was too late that the woman was smelling her breath. she could feel the woman's hand on her arm, and she was fighting tooth and nail to break free.

". . . no?" she asked, trying her best to stay upright and not appear drunk.

she didn't succeed.

"jennifer, aren't you supposed to be in bed? it's," the teacher consulted her watch. "ten past eleven. what do you have to say for yourself?"

effy managed to slip out of the woman's grasp. "bye!" she said, turning and running away as fast as she could. that wasn't incredibly fast when effy was drunk, so she wasn't surprised when she felt a hand on her arm.

"jennifer, stop that right now!" the teacher said, grabbing effy's other arm. she said something to someone whom effy couldn't see, and the next thing she knew was that she couldn't move a muscle.

"put her in isolation," the woman said, turning back to her patrolling. "and don't think i won't tell your sisters about this jennifer!

effy struggled harder than ever as she was carried down the corridor. "fuck you!" she screamed, just before she was thrown into the bare, empty room. "and you, you little arse!" she shrieked at the man.

bugger.

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[`j u n o adams]

sing us a song
and we'll sing it back to you

juno yawned. it was just before eleven, and she was already tired. she hadn't slept at all the night before, and not much the night before that. of course, that didn't mean she was planning to sleep tonight either. she was wearing a stripy t shirt, hidden by a black jacket, and a pair of blue jeans, and, due to lack of sleep, her glasses. her hair was pretty much straight, and that was good enough for her.

she'd already started her night, and a bottle of vodka was half empty in her hand. she dowed the rest of the bottle in one go, and giggled to herself as she rolled the empty bottle under her bed. there was supposed to be a party tonight, and juno could finish off getting drunk there.

opening her door, she half walked, half danced down the corridor, singing to herself as she went towards the supposed party. it was a gluttony thing, so she'd have a good night, and there'd be no need for sleep, yet again. she hadn't bothered to bring any drink, as someone else would have already done that. she did have a packet of cigarettes in her jacket pocket though, as you could never have too many cigarettes.

juno's dancing brought her crashing straight into a member of staff. the huge form of none other than brad stood before her, unmoved by juno falling into him, whereas juno fell to the floor, brad's solid body sending her tumbling.

'have you been drinking?' brad grunted. juno shook her head a little too quickly, and brad grunted again. that was all brad ever did, grunt. he reached down and grabbed one of juno's arms, hauling her up to her feet before she could get up herself. staggering, she swore under her breath. 'you have been drinking,' was all brad said, before grabbing her other arm and pushing her in front of him, forcing her to walk down the corridor.

juno knew she was headed towards isolation, and refused to go without a fight. she screamed at brad, calling him every name under the sun, trying to free her arms in order to hit him, biting at his wrists, even lifting her legs up and kicking him, but he just carried her by her arms, and ignored her attempts. it was like he was a wall, only with arms and legs.

opening the door to one of the isolation rooms, brad literally threw her inside. 'oh, fuck you!' she screamed at him as he slammed the door. she was sure she heard him laughing. she didn't doubt it, sickos like brad probably took delight in putting people into isolation, especially those who protested.

standing up, she noticed that she wasn't alone. there was someone else in isolation, and she turned to see who it was. 'effy!' she laughed. 'oh thank god, i thought it was going to be shit in here.' effy was easily one of juno's best friends, possibly her best. isolation was usually boring, that was the point, but when you were in isolation with your best friend, and also slightly drunk, it wasn't half bad.

'you're drunk.' juno didn't say it as an accusation, just a statement. life was fun drunk, juno had discovered. she had no problem with effy being drunk, though everyone else seemed to. juno wasn't really one to judge. she sat back down on the floor, and laughed. she didn't know why she was laughing, but it was probably just the vodka.

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[{ effy mosse]

{effy lianne mosse

let me be your stupid little fuck up }

effy continued to scream at the door for at least ten minutes after the man – was it brad? effy could never remember people’s names around here – had thrown her in the bare room, feeling stoked up and hyper and pissed off, all at once. she knew that it was because of the drink, but she also hated that caitlin was going to find out that effy had been drinking again, and she’d think that effy was an even bigger fuck up than she already was. effy hated being thought of as a fuck up, mainly because she knew that she was one anyway.

checking that she hadn’t the bottles of vodka on her way towards the isolation rooms, effy relaxed when she felt both of them still in her pockets. aiming one last kick at the door and screaming more profanities at the people she knew weren’t there, effy threw herself down onto the floor and rested her head on her knees. she loved being drunk, usually, but she didn’t half hate it when she started to come down from the high. pulling one of the bottles out of her jacket, effy took a long drink, smiling drunkenly to herself.

effy looked around her in interest. this was the first time she’d ever been in isolation, but she’d heard that they usually chucked more than just one person in the same room. that kind of defeated the cause really, didn’t it? isolation was when you were supposed to be alone, by yourself for hours, so it didn’t really work when someone else was shoved in the same room as you. taking another drink of her vodka – the bottle was already pretty much empty – effy grinned again. the people here were really, really dim if they didn’t think that students went drinking and didn’t bring spares.

hearing someone outside the door, effy quickly screwed the top back onto the bottle and tried to put it into her pocket. when she found that she couldn’t do that easily, effy hid it underneath her jacket. she blinked and shielded her eyes when the door was flung open, unused to the bright light outside. they hadn’t turned the lights on in the isolation rooms yet, so effy was used to the dark. she liked the dark.

'oh, fuck you! effy! oh thank god, i thought it was going to be shit in here.’

effy grinned at juno, her mood quickly lifting. she hadn’t seen her friend in an age . . . juno was always at gluttony parties, these days, though effy was sometimes asked to come along. more often than not, effy was busy herself at pride parties.

“juno,” effy said, grinning.

'you're drunk.'

“yep.” effy said, pulling the bottle back out from underneath her jacket. “as are you. want some?” she asked, indicating the three quarter empty bottle of vodka. she took another swig and laughed. she knew juno wouldn’t be all weird with her drinking. more often than not, effy and juno got drunk at the same time. it made for one hell of an evening.

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[`j u n o adams]

sing us a song
and we'll sing it back to you

laughing, juno stuck her tongue out at effy. 'as am i,' she repeated. she laughed again as effy offered her vodka. the girl had guts, sneaking around with bottles hidden on her person, after her curfew, at only fourteen. the staff would probably kill her. wondering why she hadn't had them taken off her before she got thrown into isolation, juno nodded her head.

'do you even have to ask?' she took the bottle from effy and had a long drink, giggling as she handed the bottle back. 'effy, you are a star. a superstar!' having already drank one bottle of vodka in her room, and half of it in one go, she was definitely starting to get drunk. she giggled some more, and reached into her pocket, pulling out a cigarette and her pink lighter. 'you mind?' she asked effy, but didn't wait for an answer as she flicked her lighter, lit the cigarette and took a drag, breathing out a cloud of grey smoke. the isolation rooms were not the best place to be smoking, as there were no windows to open to let the smoke out, but a juno without nicotine was far worse than a smoke filled room.

'huh. i was supposed to be going to a party tonight. a gluttony one too,' juno muttered to herself, though given her current state, her muttering was very clear and quite loud. certainly loud enough for effy to hear, but juno didn't mind. she was mildly disappointed about the party, as it was supposed to be one fun night, but hey, there would be other parties, and effy was pretty much her best friend. at least isolation wouldn't be totally shit like it usually was, and at least they had vodka, and cigarettes. juno would have killed for some drugs, but she barely thought of that when she started laughing.

'god effy, we are such alcoholics. thrown in here for drinking, hiding it under your jacket. what are we like?' juno kept laughing, though she didn't know what was funny. she was a bit of a lightweight, and one bottle usually had her quite drunk. at parties, she got totally wasted, and had the time of her life, apparently. she wouldn't really know, as she didn't remember much.

'let's have our own party. we've got the drink, i've got the cigarettes, what more do we need? well, you know what i mean.' she hoped effy knew what she meant, as she didn't herself.

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[{ effy mosse]

{effy lianne mosse

let me be your stupid little fuck up }

effy pushed herself as juno practically snatched the vodka off of her. a load of people had problems with effy drinking, but juno didn't. she was probably one of the only people here who didn't regard her as a fuck up; who didn't care what she'd done or who she was related to, or how bloody young she was. effy hated being the youngest person here; you got noticed, and being noticed wasn't something effy wanted. she liked to fade into the background, as it were, so that she didn't get into fights about her gang with members of other gangs.

it was hard work being fourteen.

accepting the bottle back from juno, effy laughed along with her, making drinking pretty much impossible. effy wanted to drink, not drown. she smiled at juno and flicked her hair out of her face, wishing more than ever that she'd straightened it that morning, but it just took so much effort, and effy had been recovering from a pride party anyway.

'you mind?'

effy shook her head. she loved juno and all, but when juno didn't have her drugs or cigarettes, she wasn't the most pleasant person to be around. "no, go ahead," she said, waving her hand and finally taking another sip from the bottle. "oh, i found these in cait's pocket," she said pulling the pack of cigarettes from her jacket. she threw them across at juno, wrinkling her nose. "thought you might like them."

effy took another sip of the bottle - it was at least three quarters empty now, and she still had a bottle left, not to mention the five or six full bottles of vodka stashed underneath her bed. effy looked up and almost spilled the vodka when juno started talking. effy was more out of it than she'd realised.

'huh. i was supposed to be going to a party tonight. a gluttony one too,'

effy smiled. she couldn't remember if there was a pride party she was supposed to go to tonight, or whether cait had invited her to the lust party. she wasn't she she'd want to go to a lust party anyway; all they did was get high and shag everyone. cait's idea of heaven; effy's idea of hell. she was only fourteen! she couldn't be expected to be going around doing things like that. in any case, she'd practically uninvited herself to cait's party and there was no way in hell she was getting out of here any time soon; they'd be better off having their own party. effy could even vaguely remember shoving her phone into her pocket before being thrown in here.

'god effy, we are such alcoholics. thrown in here for drinking, hiding it under your jacket. what are we like?'

effy grinned. "a regular little fuck up, me," she said, taking another swig of vodka. she'd gotten used to being regarded as a fuck up now, but that doesn't mean she had to like it. "besides, i don't hear you complaining,"

'let's have our own party. we've got the drink, i've got the cigarettes, what more do we need? well, you know what i mean.'

effy frowned. she knew that juno wouldn't know what she meant, so the chances of effy knowing what the hell she was on about were slim to none. but still, she nodded her head and acted like she did. "yip," she said, passing the bottle back to juno. "even if i can only have one out of the two. and even then, it's not bloody legal."

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